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quick thoughts on dating

I don't want to. I've been thinking about it a lot for months. The only reason I met up with that last guy for a possible date was because I wanted to meet a new person and something to do when I left the house. It was such a completely awkward waste of time. I hadn't gotten my guitar back then, so whatever. After I sat down with him, I couldn't bare keeping eye contact with him. Our eyes would meet and mine would immediately dart away all around. He asked what was the matter. I lied and said I thought I had to sneeze. Soon after, I started to force myself to maintain eye contact. I felt my pupils get tiny. Then we said our stupid introducing yourself speeches. Trying to sell ourselves. I look at the process of dating with a sneer anymore. But that's beside the point.

Don't want to think about sex, gender and related possible preferences anymore. I'm hating it all now.

I'm really not dating material at all. I never have been. Maybe someday, if my life improves enough. Though the way I've been feeling, I honestly don't care at all.


( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 11th, 2006 08:49 pm (UTC)
I think the dating world has just become all about selling yourself in the quickest way possible, its like a job interveiw! no one seems to want to invest time in each other.

For a world that is full of possiblities in regards to communication, everyone seems to communicate less instead of more, IM and text messaging just feels so impersonal, this is how we're expected to build a relationship?! Because we're all too busy! there's online dating and my favorite "speed dating" it makes one wish to run for cover! I envy those that have managed to make this crazy fast paced world work for them and to find a balance, love and happiness...
I myself feel lost in the shuffle, I don't fit in.
Jun. 11th, 2006 11:44 pm (UTC)
Aw. I bet you'll find someone the best way, through just doing what you love around new people. I on the other hand, am very isolated in the suburbs outside of the city and still need to develope my art further before it's ready for pubic exhibition. I usually only venture out to buy music or see my counselor. Nothing social. But I'm hoping to change that tune when I'm able. Hopefully soon.

"no one seems to want to invest time in each other." True. Even when that last date was looking like a mis-match, I suggested we check out some other places, instead of just getting coffee like we'd been doing. He said no, that he had some stuff he wanted to get done around the house and get to bed early for work the next day. I thought to myself, "Yeah. I should probably go home and organize my sock drawer."
Jun. 13th, 2006 02:32 am (UTC)
I think we've all had those bad kind of dates!
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )

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