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Helped Amanda do some work today. Beat rush-hour back. Grocery shopping. Nancy came back over. Always nice. Things are coming back together. Just need to get a job to buy more time. My prescription drug prices are seriously draining me. I should check out other place's prices. Talk with my doctor about looking into maybe getting me on a certain one that is less costly.

Since my initiation I've steadily come to the conclusion not to do drugs anymore. Maybe some occasional bit of pipe tobacco and alcohol every once and a while. I have the nagging feeling that I'm not doing nearly enough spiritually right now. Gotta work on controlling my mind through meditation and the music I'm working on. Especially getting the latter to expand the ranges of my mind, how could I not ask myself about drugs, "What's the point?" There isn't one.

I want to examine my depression triggers. OK so maybe I can't stop being sad about my life, at least for now. Though I handle it better some times more than others. How can I expand that?


( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Mar. 21st, 2008 05:46 pm (UTC)
I used to suffer from depression on a pretty regular basis, all throughout my life. I've seen therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists. I've taken various drugs prescribed for it. Bandages, all...

Out of spiritual interest, I took up a study of Buddhism. I quickly realized that Buddhism contains a very healthy psychology. Applying that to my life has been a minor miracle for me. No more serious depression. I still get it, but it is a thing that I allow to exist in a state of flux-I experience it for what it is and why, and I let it move on. I react this way with all my emotional states. I let them be, and then I let them go.

This may not work for everyone, and Buddhism was not a choice for me spiritually, but it gave me many tools psychologically and spiritually that I still use today. It's worth looking into. If you want any recommendations on reading material, let me know, we could hop on over to Half-Price and see what they have...
( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

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